Monica — Personal Relationship Manager for Remembering What Matters

What it is

Monica is a self-hosted personal relationship manager (personal CRM) that helps you maintain meaningful connections with family, friends, and acquaintances. It tracks birthdays, conversation notes, gift history, kids' names, food preferences, and the small details that sustain long-term relationships.

Monica is for people who want to be more intentional about relationships. Instead of relying on memory or scattered notes, you have a searchable, organized record of every important interaction and detail.

How it saves time or tokens

Monica replaces scattered notes, calendar reminders, and mental effort with a structured system. Before a dinner with friends, you review their Monica profile: what you discussed last time, their kids' ages, dietary preferences. This preparation takes minutes instead of the awkward 'remind me, how old is your daughter now?' at the table.

Automated birthday and anniversary reminders ensure you never miss important dates. The journaling feature creates a personal log that doubles as a life record.

How to use

1. Deploy Monica with Docker Compose:

curl -o docker-compose.yml \
  https://raw.githubusercontent.com/monicahq/monica/main/docker-compose.yml
docker compose up -d

1. Open http://localhost:8080 and create your account.

1. Add contacts and start recording interactions:

Contact: Jane Smith
Relationship: Close friend
Birthday: March 15
Notes: Vegetarian, two kids (Alex 8, Sam 5)
Last conversation: Discussed her new job at Acme Corp

Example

Monica's API for integrating with other tools:

# Add a contact via API
curl -X POST http://localhost:8080/api/contacts \
  -H 'Authorization: Bearer YOUR_TOKEN' \
  -H 'Content-Type: application/json' \
  -d '{
    "first_name": "Jane",
    "last_name": "Smith",
    "is_starred": true,
    "birthdate": "1990-03-15"
  }'

# Log an activity
curl -X POST http://localhost:8080/api/activities \
  -H 'Authorization: Bearer YOUR_TOKEN' \
  -d '{"summary": "Dinner at Italian place", "date": "2026-04-10"}'

Related on TokRepo

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Common pitfalls

• Trying to add every person you know on day one. Start with your closest 20-30 contacts and build the habit of logging interactions. Expand gradually.
• Not setting up email reminders. Monica's value compounds when it proactively reminds you of birthdays and follow-ups. Configure SMTP in the settings.
• Forgetting to back up the database. Monica stores personal data that cannot be recreated. Schedule regular backups of the Docker volume or database.